Get your gear in order:
the whetting stones for the carbon steel knives
a good lock for the door
Guinness and Valium
Camels hardbox unfiltered
your bulletproof vest made from
passiflora incarnata and blue ribbon
beer tabs from 1974
a shell casing rattle
your iron boots
the will to live
you must be fluent in the language of alcohol poisoning and black out drunk, a way to reach the unhinged realm she's gone again
pack your truck for a solo trip
strap it down using a trucker’s hitch and a pocketful of hopefuls
head west and north, you will have to walk through the vineyards at night during harvest time
month of fire, season of excess, indulgence
evacuation and disorientation
lay on the ground Right before dawn make your way down the ridge to wash your hair using dew
you collect from the Lady’s Mantel, polish your crown, wear the red lipstick, let your eyeliner run
weep with both palms on the ground, weep some more then get up, stuff your mouth using your two hands with late season Muscat grapes, wild boar sausages, vagrancy and damask rose petals let it all run down your arms, let go of your mind
those with a weak suck at birth should not follow you here
tell them to not wait for you
don’t follow don’t follow don’t follow don’t follow
“ “ “ “
“ “ “ goodbye
leave town irresponsibly without a plan
pick up a topo map along the way and
follow the dragon veins along the east side of the Sierras
ride the backbone of California
where men are put in their place Fall in love make a big plan Make promises Fall out of love give it all away
seek solitude Soak in the hot springs then be silent
and watch the sunset Fall asleep singing
an invisibility song complete with a flicker feather
tied in your hair Wake up in Joshua Tree and sit in the dirt
get down on your belly and collect tiny crystals
from the anthills, just lay there
make a bundle with them, chaparral and a traveling song, then lineup 365 .45 caliber hollow point
count them and your blessings then carefully
sew them into your inseam alongside Ativan
copal and peonia seeds
lean against huge boulders bigger
than all of your collective regrets Leave them there
sip mezcal from a demitasse as you walk out
and into the Mojave with Owl’s clover blossoms in your hair.
Jolaoso Pretty Thunder
Jolaoso Pretty Thunder lives in the deep woods of Northern California on the native land and home of the Kashaya Pomo, with her family and two dogs Rosie Farstar and Ilumina Holy Dog. She is a farmer, freedom grower, practitioner and student of herbal medicine and the founder of The Cloud Women's Dream Society, as well as a contributor and publisher of Cloud Women's Quarterly Journal. She is a well-traveled poet who loves rock, porch swings, pickup trucks, cooking, campfires, lightning, steak, long drives, hot cups of coffee, gathering and making medicine and singing with friends and family. She is a practitioner of Indigenous Spiritual and healing traditions. Generationally gifted/cursed and charged with possessing the 5 Clairs.